The "Other" Man/Woman

Ready to judge me? It's fine. I risk that by blogging in the first place.

I have been "The Other Woman" at least three times... that I know of, anyway. Funny thing about that: they don't always tell you there's someone else.

Yes, men boys have cheated on their significant others with me. Am I proud of it? Of course not. I felt terrible, but there wasn't much I could do about it. Mostly because I wasn't aware at the start. Does that make it ok? Of course not, especially if I didn't stop once I found out. But where does responsibility really lie when you are the "Other?"

Everyone needs to be responsible for their own actions. If someone wants to cheat on their significant other, is it really the responsibility of the third party to tell them not to? Well, no, not technically. And I've convinced myself of this; it's not my problem, not my fault, he's old enough to make his own choices, it's not my fault he's a douche.

However, no one should condone cheating. I personally don't believe it's ever okay in any situation, so if someone has the opportunity to stop it from happening, they should take it. And I certainly know that's easier said than done. There are feelings involved and when you want someone so badly you'll do anything to get them, you probably don't give many shits as to who else is in their life. You "win." But if you really have feelings for that person, do you want to know they're capable of cheating? And if you don't, is it worth possibly ruining their relationship just for a meaningless hook-up?

When presented with the opportunity to hook up with a guy who's already tied down, I always think, "How would I feel if I were this guy's girlfriend and I found out that another chick was bangin' him on the side?" I'd be mad at my boyfriend, obviously, because.. what a fucking disrespectful prick. But I'd probably be mad at her, too. He can only go 75%; he needs someone to bring the other 25% to the dirty, cheating table and there she was with it. She had the opportunity to tell someone not to do it, but she encouraged the act and is therefore also guilty.

The bottom line here: if someone comes on to you and you know they're already taken, put your fucking foot down. You can't have your cake and your ice cream, too. (I'm pretty sure that's how that phrase goes..)